2.5 months: Awesomeness, fun, him telling me (and his bff who relayed this to me) that he never liked a girl as much as he liked me. His friends telling me how he is an emotional robot and they’ve never seen him like this. Him sending me gushy gross texts, him being affectionate, etc.
30 days ago: I meet his best friends. I am warned he doesn’t do PDA and probably won’t acknowledge me too much in public. He kisses me the second I walk in in front of everyone and keeps his arm around me most of the night.
Christmas: He gives me a sweet card with a freakin novel in it explaining how special I am, etc. My card says “Christmas sucks slightly less without you around” and I feel like I should have written more but oh well.
Ten days ago: He introduces me to his parents, sister, and like 30+ of his friends. Many of whom say he talks about me nonstop and how much he likes me and how happy they are to see him with me. He kisses me at midnight in front of all of his friends. They add me on facebook.
Six days ago: We make dinner together. I am planning to have the “what are we” talk with him but it doesn’t feel necessary because we have a blast and I’m feeling less insecure b/c obviously we are fine. He kisses me A LOT. We act gay as usual. Things are normal. We have awesome sex. He hugs me all morning. Things are good.
Four days ago: He has boys night out. We are originally supposed to go to a party together with our friend who introduced us then they are going to have boys night but he calls me midway through the day to figure stuff out and says he has “A lot going on” and won’t make it to the party so he will meet us after or something. Something feels off. I find out Brian isn’t going to make it so I call him and sadly tell him to just forget coming to the city I guess if he wants boys night. He says ok he’ll let me know but it’s obvious he isn’t going to hang with me and something feels really off. So I back off, I don’t text him at all Saturday night, he texts me telling me they are going out in the city, I offer to let him crash with me, he doesn’t reply.
Three days ago: Turns out they ran into a bunch of girl friends, “So much for boys night, huh?” I text him. I’m offended and pissed. I let it slide but I feel like something may be up and plan to have “the talk” ASAP.
Two days ago: I get a text at noon asking if he can see me that night, saying he wants to talk about us and “where this is going and how he feels about things.” I Tell him I could meet for an hour prior to my aerial class or for longer after. He chooses prior to class and I know it’s bad and I cry at work and I spend the next 5 hours trying to figure out what I did wrong. We meet at my work when he is done and he is later than usual and it looks like he’s been crying. We have an awkward walk to the subway where I won’t look him in the eyes and when he looks at me he looks really sad and teary eyed even. We wait for the subway, he puts his arm around me and rubs my arm and kisses my head and I have a small glimmer of hope but not much. We get to my house. He tells me it’s becoming more and more apparent my heart is more in it than his and he’s been on both sides of that type of relationship and it’s never good. I’ve had all day to know this is coming so I just say ok. He looks at me baffled, wondering why I’m not fighting him, and I just say that i am not going to try to change his mind, or cry, or fight and that it’s fine and I’m sorry he wasted his time coming down to see me.
He leaves, he kisses me on the cheek. And that’s that. There’s some more but my boss just walked in and that’s the most of it.
Seriously what THE FUCK happened?
